Friends laugh together

I am so grateful for my friends. A former friend during my childhood has said really hurtful things behind my back. The things she said really tried to sway my friends away from me, to let them know that I was bad news, and they really shouldn't be associating with me. However, these people gave me the benefit of the doubt, still tried to be my friend, and now we are closer than ever. It's really comforting to know that people have your back and that they gave you a chance.

Friends sing together, la, la, la, la
Friends do things together, la, la, la, la
Friends laugh together, ha, ha, ha, ha
Friends make graphs together, la, la, la, la

Friends help you when you're in danger
Friends are people who are not strangers
Friends help you shift into a new place
Tell you if you've got food on your face

Friends are the ones on whom you can depend
He's my friend, he's not my friend
Friends are the ones who are there in the end
He's my friend, they're not my friends

If you trip over I'll catch you fall
If you kick my dick I won't break your balls
If you get drunk and vomit on me
I'll make sure you get home safely

If you cross the road and a truck struck you
I'll scrape you up and reconstruct you
I'll cheer you up if your depressed
If you get murdered I'll avenge your death

Friends walk together, la, la, la, la
Pop and lock together, zhu, zu, zee zhu
Me and him together, la, la, la, la
Me and Jim forever

Friends go jogging at the track
Friends borrow money never pay it back
Friends do not let friends to crack
Friends go out and grab a snack

Friends drink beer in the sun
And like girlfriends that don't mind if you have more than one
Friends tell you when your fly's undone
Murry your fly's undone

My uncle John had a special friend
They dressed alike his name was Ben
I've never seen two friends like them
They were very, very friendly men

La, la, la, la, friends, friends, friends
La, la, la, la, friends, friends, friends, friends
La, la, la, la, friends, friends, friends, friends
La, la, la, la, friends
La, la, la, la, ping

Mingling

Like most people, I have separate social circles. Not too long ago, I let two of them mix, and right now, I'm not sure if I particularly like my decision to do that. So one group are my two high school friends, lets call them Lisa and Ramona. I've been in and out of touch with them since high school, but since my college graduation, I've been seeing them more and more. the other group of friends, who are super dear to my heart, I'll call them The Boosh. I've gotten so close to them over the last year, I'll call them Trini (who I've known for my entire life, pretty much), Paul (who I've also known for most of my life, and is younger than the rest), Laura (Trini's best friend since high school, known for a year), and Trini's boyfriend Jensen (who I've also known for like a year). However, Jensen, Trini and Laura all went to high school with this guy, Sean, who isn't really a regular with The Boosh group, just a friend that they see every now and then.

so here's the problem:

So the Boosh group, that I'm a part of, are really really tight. We make huge efforts to hang out as much as possible, and take our outings very seriously. It's really weird if one of us happens to be missing. So, of course, with a group as tight as ours, we make a lot of plans- to see LOVE, the Cirque du Soleil show that's Beatles focused, as we play Beatles RockBand pretty much every week. It's a big part of our happenings, which mostly consist of us hanging out at Trini's, and smoking hookah. Other plans include "Magical Mystery Tour", that involves Beatle-like transcendental experience, if you know what I mean. So those are our big plans, but we make little ones, like where we plan on eating, or how to celebrate big occasions. I know it sounds like such a bitchy/snobby thing to say, but we don't take well to people adding themselves into our group. For example, Sean isn't part of our group, really. If he shows up, then okay, but we won't necessarily miss him if he's not there.

As of now, Trini is out of the country, visiting family, and the Boosh has really tried to cope without her here.

So here's how Ramona and Lisa fit in. Of course, like any normal person, in conversation, I relate my experiences and thoughts, and surely, my friends figure in to what I talk about. I know that Ramona is a Beatles fan, and is quite artistic like Trini and I thought that she would be a nice person to bring over, randomly, and that she might be a "floater", like Sean is. Lisa, I wasn't too sure about. If you didn't get the point from above, the Boosh group is pretty chill, and we don't really go out often and all. Lisa, however, is quite the opposite, as she likes dancing, going out, drinking, whatever. I tell my Boosh friends about my friends, and one day, Jensen told me to invite them over to the bar he goes to, as we were planning on drinking that night.

Okay, so Jensen, Laura, and I go pick up the two girls and we go to the bar, where Sean is also a regular. Obviously, Paul is not of age, and does not factor into this part of the story. In any case, we all get drunk, whatever, and Sean obviously clicks with my friends. Lisa is a total flirt to him, and Ramona shares his passion for creating (he writes, she draws). In any case, this type of behavior pretty much continues for a week or so- just a lot of drinking, which isn't really normal of the Boosh crew at all.

As this behavior was shocking to me, I talked to Laura, who I'm very close to. We both shared a lot of the same ideas, that it wasn't fair that Paul was suddenly being shut out of our plans, that we typically aren't a bunch of drunks, and that frankly, Sean wasn't really a part of our group, and it wasn't really cool of him to suddenly feel like he was one of us. Both Laura and I had the vibe that Sean had a thing for one of them, and that people might eventually get hurt.

The ultimate point is, Lisa, Ramona and Sean are acting like this type of behavior is normal, like we're one mega-group now, and that's it's all cool. IT'S NOT! The Boosh crew is what matters most to me, to be honest. It's not cool that Ramona and Lisa feel that they can come with us to Vegas to see LOVE and they feel like Sean is totally part of it. I don't appreciate them calling us+Sean : the Boosh crew. It's really not. I feel like the three of them have tried to insert themselves in a group that really isn't there's, or really any of their business to join. Trini hasn't even met them yet, and she's such a big part of our group, she's like our anchor.

As much as possible, I try to get Boosh infusions, where it's just us, because that's what it all boils down to, essentially. In the past, bringing in people has only added unnecessary drama, and I don't want any part of it. I don't want Sean to hook up with my high school friends, I hate when Lisa acts like she was there for something that she wasn't, and goes on about it like she knows everything. I'm annoyed with her whining and complaining about being trapped and going to Hawaii. I'm tired of Ramona talking about Scott Pilgrim and about Sean. Don't go around calling people by certain nicknames and not knowing the reason. I know it sounds possessive, but these are my friends, and frankly, I don't care if they stay floaters, and that they only show up like once a month or less. I'm tired of their disrespect for Paul. He's underage! He can't be out late, he shouldn't be drinking a lot, and going out to bars all the time and having get togethers without him is just plain rude and unfair. Please take him into consideration when you make plans. They are not Boosh crew. At all. A part of me wishes that they never got to meet, and that things could carry on the way they were.

I know this post is angry, and I'm probably all crazed because of the hormones, but I'm just so tired of it all. I am seriously counting down the days when Trini gets back, in the even that she can bring some normality back into our group.

Happiness is a Warm Gun

Frankly, I've had a lot of free time, and I'm using it more wisely, I think. so what's on the menu you ask?

• World cup action, baby! I admit, I do appreciate football/soccer. I think it's an absolutely fascinating sport and I have to commend the people who play it. It looks incredibly difficult. In any case, I'm more of a fair-weather fan, with the intention of getting more into it. I'm really just so fascinated by it all. Of course, I'm rooting on Team USA, but I do have to admit that other countries have superior programs and so I expect a lot of success from the others.
• Books, books, books! Some were bought, others were from the library.
• Gym. I realize that I have to be healthier. I've put on weight over the years, and I'm hoping to get it off. Overall, I just want the endorphins.
• Lab work. It's taking up a bit of time, and I love it.

My friends and I plan on going to Vegas soon to watch the Beatles "LOVE" Cirque du Soleil show. I can't wait. I've been listening to the music for months now. I know that the last post was rather gloomy, and a lot of that hasn't changed at all, but I am more upbeat about it than just offing myself.

recent updates

I've walked at commencement, and have one semester left of my undergraduate career. Honestly, I'm terrified. At the graduation dinner, so many people came up to me and said how proud they were of me, and congratulated me on my achievement. To be honest, I didn't really feel deserving of their praise. I wasn't really a college graduate that night, yet they showered me with gifts. I walked on the commencement lawn, knowing that I'd be coming to the same university campus in a few months, back in the same classrooms. Ultimately, I'm not sure if I'm ready for the "real world", where I'd have to look for a job, interview for a position, and make a living for myself. To prep myself for this, I've looked at different job-seeking websites and looked up jobs that were associated with what i had been studying at university. The process made me incredibly sad. I lacked any real experience, and all the positions seemed to have rather hefty requirements. All in all, I'm just not ready to take the next step.As a result, I've been trying to keep myself busy, to make it seem like my day's not a waste of time. I've been at the research lab, out shopping, going for walks, just to get out of the house.

The job hunting process isn't the only thing getting me down. Lately, I've been feeling rather empty and lonely. I mean, yes, I have friends and I see them rather regularly, but I feel this disconnect. I don't know what's wrong with me. I essentially feel like I have no one to talk to, just letting the feelings simmer inside. the lonely feelings. the sad feelings. Will I ever fall in love? Will I ever find a meaning to my existence? Does anyone care?

I'm not one to resort to horrible things like harming myself. Plus, my current reading material doesn't really support that line of thinking. The summertime, despite its horrible weather and absolute free time, I've started reading books again, simply for the sake of reading, not because I have a paper due the next day. For some reason, I've been drawn to non-fiction writing, and after the whole international incident with the submarine sinking between North Korea and South Korea, I've picked up some books on the lives of people who defected from North Korea. It's just something I don't really know about, or rather, the world doesn't really know about. I found it fascinating and heart-breaking at the same time. I guess in a way it's really helped me stay positive. It makes me feel grateful that I have a roof over my head, that I have the freedom to do things, that the society I live in treats women well. I wish there was a way that I could help them.

Also, the free time has really let me get all fanciful about my future. I want to visit UNESCO heritage sites, take a trip across the Trans-Siberian railway, from Moscow all the way to Vladivostok. I want to see the glaciers in the US before global warming causes them to disappear forever. I want to see the fjords in Norway. Is it bad that I want to do this more than I want a laboratory position? I mean, granted, i do love my microbes, but I find this all so fascinating too. A part of wishes that i could go back in time, and declare myself as a history major, exploring different cultures and events over time. I just sometimes wish I was stronger, and that I wasn't so afraid.

Be the Jedi.

I feel like my life is quickly changing. The commencement ceremony is pretty much right around the corner, and with it, graduation and the “real world”. So many of my classmates are ready to go, at full speed, looking to the future that lies in front of them. They already know where they’re going with their lives: doctor, optometrist, nurse, teacher, clinical lab scientist, businessman, nutritionist, etc. I still don’t know where exactly I’m going. Initially, I though that I was destined for pharmacy school, that I would get my bachelor’s degree, and then be a pharmacist. Now that I’ve taken more classes and learned more about myself, I don’t really think that I belong there. I hate organic chemistry and structure, and I’m not interested in kinetics or inhibitors. I know that once you’re done with pharmacy school, the information you really need to know is about the medications. Yet, I don’t want to be stuck in school for 4 years, studying something that I don’t really find any interest in.

On the other hand, I have other friends that I like to spend time with a lot. I really think that time flies by when we hang out. I finally feel like I’m part of something. At the same time, I worry about it lasting, or essentially, not lasting. One is going to grad school in Chicago. Another is off to art school in San Francisco. Someone else is off to Las Vegas in a year to study culinary school. I constantly have this feeling that I’m being left behind, that I have all my contemporaries pursuing their dreams, going out into the world and doing something with their lives. I don’t want it to end.

Today I watched that movie “Men Who Stare at Goats”, and I think it was trying to tell me something. Sometimes we don’t really know where we’re going, or what exactly we’re destined to do or become. Life gives us little clues, and it’s up to us to interpret those clues and get on the right path. I like to think that we’re all part of something bigger. Like the movie, I always felt that I was different, that I didn’t exactly fit in with the people around me for some reason. I know that it’s childish and foolish to think that you have superpowers, or you’re particularly gifted in some way, but I just don’t know… I need to know what life has in store for me.

Emotional Rollercoaster

For some stupid reason, I'm upset. There really isn't any sort of major reasoning behind it, it's just that things aren't necesarily going my way and so I'm mad about it. Examples:

1. Signing up for group work. I accidentally signed up for a different group, and so I'm working with some people I'm not too familiar with. I am SO MAD about it. I can't even comprehend it.
2. Taking a class because I would know people and so I wouldn't have problems finding a partner. WRONG. I ended up having to reach out to random people because the professor asked us to find partners right away. It drives me crazy.
3. Making a fool of myself in front of the lab professor. I should be more active and much more devoted. Instead, I'm not looking too sharp.
4. Being nervous about presentations. I wish I wasn't rushing and being such a wuss.

GAHHH. I'm just so tired of all of this. I want the hormones to go away and just to be a much more balanced me.

Fight On!

Tonight, Manny Pacquiao is fighting Miguel Cotto. As a huge Filipino icon, there's bound to be parties and get-togethers tonight to watch the big fight. My family is no exception. Plus, it's my brother's birthday, and so there's bound to be some extra fun. Go Manny!

I changed the layout. Again. Unfortunately, my tastes change far too often, and I don't even know how long I'm going to keep this layout. As for now, it's good. Also, I changed the title of the blog, and the tagline. I think it encapsulated more about who I am. I may not know where I'm going in life, or what exactly I want and need in life, but I always know that I should really stop dwelling on the negative and really start looking at what I can do better, or look at my own situation in comparison to others. I'm in a pretty good situation, and as a woman, I feel incredibly grateful that I don't experience any sort of major injustices that women experience in general throughout the world.

The title of this post really is just to be much more positive. I've got a gnarly schedule next week, and I have to keep pushing on, or try to be motivated about studying. It's definitely not going to be easy, but I have to try. I didn't do well on the first exam for genetics, and I feel pressured to do much better, like a B. There's a lot of work to do, as some of the processes are not easy to grasp. I just need to motivate myself, that's all.

It's tough right now to be motivated- the Lakers have games, I think I have a crush on one of my friends in my T/Th meetups, and I have to be focused. Wish me luck!

Lab update

hmmm. I'm running an experiment and there's a lot of downtime. How do I spend it? By wasting time and taking quizzes on facebook of course!

What's your Inner Nationality? GERMAN. You are precise yet romantic, efficient yet dreamy, friendly yet somewhat suspicious of others. You rarely smile, but when you do it's very meaningful. You like it best when there is a group consensus, and yet you are easily annoyed by the slowness and/or stupidity of others. Sometimes you think that if only you could live on an island or move to some wonderful place far away, everything would be better, and if you can't realize this dream you often lose yourself in books/vacations/recipes/sports -- anything for an escape! All in all, however, you make your peace with life, and have many old friends.

Ok, never mind. I realize I should be a lot more productive. I just read what I wrote this morning, and yeah, I should follow it. Until next time!

Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life/Semester Update!

So it's nearing the midpoint of the semester. Hmmm. Unfortunately, I feel that I've been rather mediocre in a lot of my classes and I think I'm ready to step it up. At least, I'll have to try in some capacity. So here's what's going on:

• In the lab, I've been feeling a bit guilty- I haven't really been spending too much time here, and I feel like I really need to be taking some time out of my day to really devote myself to it, instead of just kinda going when I want to. I also am feeling a bit weird, as I'm hardly ever talking to the professor leading the lab. You'd think that we'd be spending more time together, but apparently not. It's just been sorta awkward. I think I need to exert more effort on that front too.
• Genetics it taking up a lot of time. The professor isn't as scary as before, but she does keep you on your toes. Have to keep working. Lots of reading. I still haven't gotten back my first exam, so I'm still tentative as to how I'm approaching this class, and whether or not I need to crank it up a notch or what.
  
• Biochem is a really tough class. unfortunately, I'm not really spending a lot of time with it. It's hard to focus on something that I frankly don't find that interesting. I have a quiz on Thursday, so I'll have to work on it more.
• Mycology is so irritating. It's such an easy class, yet I'm getting a B in it. I'm working waaay to hard to just get a B. I want a A. It's 5 units!
• Molec Cell is just like the unwanted child. No attention at all. I want an A in that too, but I got a high C/low B on that test. It's tricky, since all the questions are multiple choice. Thankfully, it's a furlough day, as I've been fighting back sleep every time I'm in that class.

Over the weekend, I saw the musical Spamalot and I found it absolutely enjoyable/hilarious. I am not Dead yet! Hopefully, when I get more money, I can get Monty Python and the Holy Grail on DVD. Absolutely brilliant. Also, I introduced my friend to mineral makeup. OMG she loves it. I swear by this stuff, so I'm really happy to spread the joy all around.

Unfortunately, I'm still unemployed, but I'm dealing with it. I'm not actively looking for a job, and I've got a lot on my plate already.

Over the weekend, I was watching old episodes of House and I realized how much I love the old episodes. The dynamic between House and the other characters, especially his team, was just so much better. The new characters just suck. Whiny and honestly take a lot of the plot. I don't really think anyone else really likes them either. Chase. Cameron. Foreman. That's the way to go. and more Wilson too. and cuddy. especially when Cuddy and Wilson are acting like House's parents, dealing with a petulant child.

Oh, and Jim and Pam got married! So sweet. I loved that episode. Classic Office. I honestly couldn't stop laughing when Dwight kicked the bridesmaid in the face! LOL and poor Andy, getting a rip in his scrotum!

And I know this is getting ridiculous with all the television shows, but OMG I love the show Glee! So fantastic. It really is a breath of fresh air. Plus, the songs are just great. Honestly, that's pretty much all I listen to now.

Fall '09

I initially wanted to have the "annoying" post and this one put together in one super-post since I haven't posted in a while. However, I did find that I had quite a bit of annoyances in my life that I felt it was taking all the attention away from the fact that the new school year started. Anyway, like discussed in the previous post, briefly, the university is broke, so there are quite a few furlough days. Honestly, I do feel guilty, as I don't think I utilized mine to the full potential. It's okay though, my grandma had cataract surgery, so I was a the hospital for a few hours. So, I just wanted to say that I like having most of the people I know and like in the same classes as me. It's been interesting, to say the least.

class reviews!

• Mycology/Parasitology- The professor for this class is so funny and kinda sweet at the same time. I really like him. He's rather elderly, sort of like a cool grandpa to be honest. A friend of mine took this class last semester and she had positve thing to say, so I'm looking forward to the rest of the class. He does have a rather distracting comb-over though, and sometimes find myself looking at it, but honestly, I think he's such a cool guy, I'll let it slide.

• Molecular Biology- The professor of this class seems like a nice woman. She cracks jokes sometimes and she's really clear in presenting material. Plus, she gives little questions like a study guide, which is great. I also have this class with a friend, so it's even better. Not going to lie, though, the class seems to drag on for what seems like 2x the length of the normal class time.

• Microbial Genetics- I had a rather bad first meeting with this professor. She's a bit intense, and she caught me a bit off guard. During roll, she called me by my middle name, and then proceeded to tell me to speak up or be dropped from her class. Scary, to say the least. Still, she seems tough, but really knowledgeable in the material. I think I'll be enjoying her class.

• Biochemistry I- Wow. Let me just say that. The professor for this class is kinda scary. He's pretty tough and I'm not quite sure yet how I feel about him. He goes through things rather quickly and doesn't speak very loudly. I think I'm going to spend a lot of time going over the material.

Lab work's been going rather well. However, with the furlough and the 3 day weekend too, I'm finding it rather difficult to run experiments, especially as I need to check on them every few days and stuff. I need to just keep working.

Unfortunately, I am one of those people who gets distracted rather easily. Not good, as I recently am totally addicted to the show Glee. It's amazing. Screw the people who say it's like High School Musical. Totally not. Anyway, my Wednesdays will be filled with that show. I'm feeling rather lucky that the Lakers don't start playing until October, or else I'll really be distracted. I <3 those guys. Can't wait for them to get their rings. Too bad about Trevor. and I hope Pau gets his finger healed in time for the EuroBasket. I know it's important for him to play.

God, please give me strength to not blow up. I need to be functioning this week.

Dealing with annoying

So the Fall Semester has officially begun last week, and it's been interesting. I'll give a run-down of each individual professor/class in a bit, but I needed to get some things off my chest first. To begin with, since I'm at the upper-division level, a lot of my classes are with the same people. I really like that, as it's easier to make friends, easier to ask questions, and you know most of the people you're with. It's good. Unfortunately, along with the positive things, there are negatives. For example, if there's an annoying person, you have to deal with that person too. Case in point: last semester, I was taking two classes with one person, back to back, so it would make sense to walk to the other class with the other person. Well, at the end of last semester, we talked about the future, grad school, and how we would need recommendation letters. So, I took the initiative, emailed professors, and ultimately, got the gig at the micro ecology lab on campus. I really like it. The people are nice, I get excited when I see my cultures grow, and I honestly think I'm learning quite a bit. So, when the new semester came around, I gave this person an update, and honestly, I think the person got a nudge and now might be working in the same place as me. Now, typically, I wouldn't really be upset. However, I am finding myself not liking this person that much, and I feel pretty smothered by this person. First of all, I needed to speak to the professor running the lab, and the person felt like he should come along. I don't know if I'm properly explaining my irritation but I am rather irritated. I'm the kind of person who likes to do things alone, like drive alone, shop alone. So for me, I feel pretty damn smothered when people go with me on my errands. I don't want to wish ill on anyone, but I honestly hope this person doesn't get the job in my lab, or I hope this person is never there when I am. Dealing with this person is enough in classes. I just feel that certain sectors of my life should never mix. Certain groups of friends stay in certain groups, and they just don't intermingle, and I'm totally okay with that. I'll just have to be curt as much as possible. I think that sometimes, just giving people the cold treatment is the best thing. Hopefully, they get the hint.

Funny, this person hangs out with another person that I knew that liked to smother other people, liked to call all the time, just be annoying. I wonder if that's some sort of coincidence or not.

Here's another thing. The other day, I went to my friend's house to hang out and unfortunately, her brother's family was there too. Now here's the thing. I hate her brother. He's so annoying and he thinks he knows everything. As a result, he keeps talking to you and it's about something you don't want to hear about. Oh, and his wife works where I used to work. She's the one that got me the job. Anyway, she's really sweet. He's not. So when I came over to see my friend, I was not happy to see him there. I keep thinking, please please don't talk to me and just watch your kids and talk to your parents instead. Alas, not so lucky. To make matters worse, the first thing he says to me is , "So I heard you got laid off at work." Oh gee. Thanks for rubbing that in my face. So I try to play it off, by saying "It's alright. I mean, well, what can I do, you know, the university is broke." Then he proceeds to say: "That's not true. It's the budget that's the problem." "Well, yeah, I know. I've been getting long emails about that from the university." I think to myself, gosh, my self-esteem is in the dumpster right now. Just please, you made a very bad attempt at small talk, so you can go away now. Still unlucky. He starts talking about the budget. First, I don't like talking to him, and to make matters worse, he talks about the last thing I ever want to talk about. Politics. So he asks a rather invasive question, "so what political party do you belong to?". I answer honestly, hoping he won't keep asking more. Then, he proceeds to talk about Obama's health care reform plans and asks how I feel about it. I tell him, "honestly, I don't know enough about it to really make an informed decision, but I know it's been in the news a lot recently". Apparently, that's not enough to send him away, and he tells me a lot of things, especially about how Obama is a socialist and how I should be complaining and pretty much urging my congressman to vote against it. If there's one thing I cannot stand, it's when people try to push a particular political agenda in my face. Needless to say, I was pretty pissed off about that. Definitely not helping me like you more. Go away.

workin' day and night

On Friday, my boss told me that I would be let go by the start of the Fall Semester. Honestly, for the last few months, I felt like I wanted to quit, due to the fact that I wasn’t getting a lot of hours, and the hours weren’t really that great for my schedule. Still, even though the situation was really tough, I always felt that the job was safe, and that I had a good hourly rate. Plus, with all the crazy unemployment in the country and in the state, recently, I’ve felt that just having a job was a good thing. Over the last few weeks, a lot of the staff members were going to union meetings to discuss scary things like furloughs and layoffs. So of course I had no reason to think my job was secure. Now that I’ve been given the warning and by the end of the month I’ll be unemployed, I’m scared. Over the last year and a half, I’ve been able to pay for my own expenses and had some sort of independence. It’ll be a weird feeling having to borrow money from my parents for awhile. Searching for a job will be rather difficult, given that most companies aren’t hiring and that I’m a full-time student. Wish me luck.

Outgrowing your childhood

Occasionally, I like to get nostalgic about my childhood and so I watch old cartoons, shows and movies from when I was younger. Some of those things include: Pokemon, Power Rangers, good nickToons like Rocko’s Modern Life, Backstreet Boys, etc. Essentially, it’s all the stuff from the mid to late ‘90s when I was growing up. In any case, I’m worried that Harry Potter is now falling into the same category. See, Harry Potter was such a huge thing for me. I know it’s wasn’t really part of the same time period, but it was still a big deal.

I wasn’t really into it that much when the first three books came out. I remember seeing all three at Costco and my Auntie bought me book 1 and I got the other two. I remember buying book 4 when it came out and by then I was absolutely hooked. I dragged my dad and my brother, ultimately, for book 5, and I inhaled that book. I absolutely was thinking all about what the next sorts of things would happen in the last two books of the series. For book 6, I will never forget my experience. I was overseas, and I really wanted my book. I dragged my aunt to the local bookstore and saw the piles of Harry Potter books at the front of the store. I grabbed one, and was on my way to the checkout line. As I was walking there, I looked at the pricetag, did a little mental conversion of what the price would be in USD. It turned out to be around $35-40. I was not happy, and I didn’t have enough money on hand. I left the bookstore empty-handed. Thankfully, my dad called me later that afternoon. I told him that when I arrived, I wanted him to hand me the book, and I would pay him back later. So I waited two looooong weeks for my book. Funny enough, my dad didn’t have it because he didn’t know what I was talking about. I got in the car and bought the first copy I saw. For book 7, I went to the midnight thing. I had to get it. I slept at 4am after I got the book around 1am. I finished the book in 3 days.

I was so excited when the movies came out, but was quickly disappointed when I saw them. I didn’t like how a lot of things were cut out, or plotlines were changed. Sure, I understood that film is a different sort of medium to convey the story, but I guess I was spoiled by Lord of the Rings. Peter Jackson put everything possible in those films, so true to the source material, that it was like a fan had made the film. Absolutely epic in every way. So I’ve been upset for awhile about the films, but I still enjoyed it. However, something strange started happening after watching book 5. I absolutely was bored with the film, and it was becoming worse for book 6.

Similarly, even for the books, as I look back on it, Book 5 really did show a turning point for me. When book 5 ended, like I said, I had little ideas of what would happen next. When I read book 6, I was a bit disappointed. I felt that everything that happened at the end of book 5 really had little bearing on the later books. There was nothing about the veil, the weird stuff at the Ministry, none of it. Instead, book 6 was really about the whole growing up thing, which was nice, since they were teenagers, but it just felt she could have added more in book 5 too, or something, and the horcruxes were sprung on really suddenly too. It just seemed so unbelievable for Harry to find and destroy all the Horcruxes in one single book. Sure enough, he did, but I just felt like it was loaded with deus ex machina and rushed plot and unnecessary killing.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I still love Harry Potter. I will still watch the movies, because I feel like I owe it to myself to see how the series ends. It was just such a huge part of my life. I still reread the books and feel the magic that captivated me years ago. The only thing different now is that I’ve moved on, and I feel that it’s just a natural thing to do so. I think that if I ever have children, I want them to read these books and feel the same magic and thrill when I read them. Still, I think the most important thing to do when feeling nostalgic is to look back and think “I was into this stuff?”. It’s not exactly necessary to enjoy it now like I did before, but to appreciate it and move on.

living overseas

Over the last few weeks, I’ve been watching the Tour de France. Occasionally I catch the prime time coverage, and they have plenty of shots of the French/Spanish/Swiss landscape that are absolutely beautiful. The hills are so green, the buildings look like what I always imagined what a small European town looked like, the sky so blue. It’s a fantastic sight to see. Hopefully, one day, I could be there, watching the cyclists pass by me, and join in the ruckus of the spectators in the Alps or Pyrenees. It’ll be an once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

In any case, this post isn’t really about living in the French countryside. Over the last year or so, I’ve lost three of my very good, if not best, friends who have moved out of the country for schooling. The three of them are currently living overseas to attend university. It’s strange to talk to them, hear about their experiences. First of all, their classes are in English, but outside of that, the entire country speaks another language, which they aren’t entirely familiar with. When I find myself thinking about them and what they’re possibly doing at this hour, I wonder if they’re in class, sleeping, hailing a cab, eating, arguing with a local, whatever. I miss them.

Yesterday, I was able to talk to the moms of two of them. As parents, they worry and miss them. They shared their experiences, and some of them I could relate to, like the language barriers, the racism against foreigners, the culture shock, the higher level of independence, etc. Definitely, they are a lot stricter about academics over there. You have to stand when the teacher calls you, the full load of classes is like 30 units(!) and even at the university level, there’s uniforms. Honestly, I always used to get scared about public transportation there, as the drivers want to make as much money as possible, and they cram as many people as possible in the vehicle ,which would be very uncomfortable, considering that you didn’t know some of those people. There’s security guards everywhere, who open doors for you. It was kinda nice actually, feeling like a celebrity.

Funny, my mom asked me if I could handle it. I told her I would probably cry. I think I’m fairly strong, but I’m not going to lie, I’m a bit of a snob, and I worry the locals might not like me. Still, I’ve visited the country numerous times in my childhood. Now that I’m an adult, I wonder if I could just jump right in and do it: take public transportation, not be scared to cross the street, budget my money totally like pay all the bills, clean up, etc. I worry about fitting in and me not getting homesick. When I was younger, after about a week or so, I would throw a tantrum and whine, saying I wanted to go home. With all the problems that my friends went through with immigration, I know they think twice about quitting and going home. I wish them the absolute best. I wonder if I could handle it. I suppose I never really had the full college experience, so my feelings are different.

So now, I reflect back on my whole France dream-experience. I took a semester of French, and when watching the stage coverage during the Tour, there’s a conglomerate of different people from different places (just look at all those flags- where is that the flag of?!). Will I be okay/strong enough to interact with the locals, other spectators and have a good time, or will I cry about it and wish I was home? Ultimately, I wish I was as determined as my friends. Being out of your comfort zone is really hard. Hopefully I can use this as some sort of motivational tool to get me out of my shell. We’ll see.

"Celebrate with Dignity"

Yesterday, I went to the Lakers parade. It was quite a bit of fun, but in no way did I think most people were “celebrating with dignity”. Right after the Lakers won the championship, immediately after, there was a commercial with Kobe, Phil, Derek, maybe Pau, I can’t remember exactly. All of them were saying how the fans represented the team, and how our celebrating should show other people how Laker fans celebrate, and we should celebrate with dignity. Exactly. However, I did think it was really ridiculous how the players have to tell you to do that. It’s plainly obvious that you should celebrate in a classy way.

There’s something stupid about LA fans though. About 10 minutes after airing that commercial, a small riot broke out in downtown LA, right outside Staples Center. Needless to say, it was really embarrassing, as that sort of behavior was in no way a reflection of how I celebrate Laker victories, or how other people I know celebrate. It’s one thing to loot a store and sell it for money or keep it for yourself. However, it’s a completely other thing to loot from a store and then just burn everything you stole. It was disgusting and embarrassing. I hope other sports fans don’t think all Laker fans are this way.

Unfortunately, stupid behavior was happening the day of the parade too. Maybe just at the Coliseum where I was, but I think I’m going to follow my Mom’s advice and just go to the parade route instead if I ever go again. In any case, it was about 7 in the morning when we arrived. The people in front of us were drinking beer and smoking in the line. Come on people, I understand breakfast sandwiches and coffee, but alcohol at that hour?! It’s just so sad that there were children in line with them. Other people there had the decency to go step out of the line for a moment and go a distance away and smoke. At one point, I smelled marijuana and was really disgusted. The worst part was, the guy in front of me had a joint in his pocket and was totally going to smoke it right in front of me. Gross. When they opened the gates, it was absolute mayhem. Let’s just say that some people really need to use deodorant, and people need to stop pushing. It was pretty horrible.

Anyway, I got to see the Lakers, although far away, and it was cool to be part of the experience. I learned a lot of things. First, always bring sunscreen. Second, bring a jacket. Not for wearing, but as a sun shield. Third, there are a lot of dumb fans, so be patient, or try to be tolerant. I hate to make this politically charged, but a lot of the dumb fans belong to a particular ethnic group. I don’t know why that is, but try to stay classy. Fourth, despite my love for Trevor Ariza, I think we would not get along in real life. He likes 'lil Wayne, Kanye, T-Pain, and his favorite car is an Escalade. Oh no. I think Trevor can still be one of my favorite Lakers, but hell, I'm marrying Pau instead :] Fifth, the guys are so cute in person. They’re total guys, jumping into each other, it was very good to see. Go get ‘em next year~!

Ups, downs, and basketball

After such a tough loss, I always feel horrible. The feeling doesn’t go away until the next game and there’s a W. Otherwise, the feeling just gets even worse. Thankfully the game is tomorrow, so it doesn’t have time to really sink in and make me really mad. Nonetheless, you really have to credit the other team. They played out of their minds last night, and they only won by 4. Kobe was not very clutch at the end of the game, and our defense was incredibly spotty. Funny thing was, Kobe was playing fairly well in the first quarter, then something happened in the second, and his shots weren’t going in. The trend continued well until the end of the game. It was very upsetting. Plus, Lamar and Andrew did not show up. Pau had brain farts all over the place. For such tall, skilled players, that sort of performance is not acceptable in any way at all.

Yesterday, I was really nervous about finally starting lab work. I was scared that the Masters’ students would be a bit scary, and that the Summer Bridge students would be fantastic and I would look like an idiot. I was pleasantly surprised. The Bridge students were very nice, although two of them seemed rather bored, and just wanted to get out of there, as they were checking their cell phones rather frequently. The other one seemed more interested, and from what I saw, didn’t check his cell phone, thankfully. The other undergrad, Emily, seemed really nice and sweet. I think she’s a lot younger than I am, maybe a sophomore? Not sure. The Master student teaching us seemed really nice and a bit dorky, reminded me of a girl I knew in high school- a bit homely looking, a bit of a geek, but really nice. The process of making things wasn’t that difficult. Nonetheless, there’s a weird feeling about how there’s not a whole lot of supervision. Pretty much, the Master’s student is the one you look to for stuff. I’m coming by again on Thursday, and I’m pretty excited. I’ve gotten over the first sort of initial anxiety, and I’m really willing to learn more. I’ve already signed a form to get a key to the building, so I feel pretty legit right now. I just hope that the Masters’ student teaches me how to do things in time for the Lakers game. Wow do I have my priorities in order.

On an unrelated note, I was listening this morning on ESPN radio. I didn’t really feel like listening to music, and I like to hear what other people think about the Lakers. I sometimes listen to the station the games are broadcast on, but they were talking about baseball, and frankly, I don’t care. The announcer guy, I dunno who he was, but had a kind of annoying voice, was talking about ratings of the NBA versus the NHL. It’s pretty obvious, in America, football reigns supreme, with baseball as a very close second. To me though, I was always a really big fan of basketball, and football’s ok, and baseball’s boring. I never really thought much about hockey at all. I always put it in the same category as soccer and rugby. Fun, but not very popular in America. I figured hockey was really popular in cold places, like Canada and Russia, where ice is everywhere, though with global warming, who knows. Similarly with soccer and rugby, sure in England and pretty much everywhere else in the world where futbol reigns supreme. To me, it just is really dumb to even compare basketball versus hockey. Of course basketball gets more ratings! So when the radio guy said that the NBA gets about 4x the amount of viewers the NHL does, it didn’t surprise me at all. But it’s interesting, when I consider that both sports are in their championship phase. The NHL has the Stanley Cup going on right now, and it’s game 6, so it has to be a pretty big deal, especially with the series going that far. The NBA has the Finals going on right now, but it’s only game 3, with the home team in a must-win situation. One guy called in and said that looking at ratings for the NHL wasn’t accurate at all, as the game is only exciting when you’re at the game. That may be true, but the sport gets LOTS of money from TV. If it’s not exciting on TV, then what?

I do have lots to say about the basketball issue, but I feel rather uninspired to talk about it at length. My broski is graduating from high school today, so congratulations to everyone in the Class of ’09!

Cheers!

don't be afraid of the censor button

I am SO sick of the stupid song by Pitbull or whoever that goes “One, two, three, four, uno, does, tres, quarto, I know you want me, you know I want ‘cha” followed by some rather vulgar things in Spanish. Now, aside from the fact that the song is INCREDIBLY annoying, it says some pretty vulgar things, and it’s not even remotely censored on the radio. I mean, come on, this is LA. A lot of people speak Spanish. So yes, it is a big deal, when a kid with relatively ok Spanish-speaking skills hears it and asks mom what that means.

This issue came to my attention when I was with my brother, who’s taking AP Spanish. The song came on the radio, and I asked him if he understood what the guy was saying. He listens, and he says something like “I know you have a big mouth… so we can play?”, followed by “Ewww. That’s dirty.” Lots of songs totally get censored due to language/content, like Britney Spears’ song “If You Seek Amy” that’s changed to “If You See Amy” to change the vulgarity, and obviously bad words like the f-bomb are censored out, or changed to something else. That’s fine, the radio stations don’t want to get fined by the FCC. Sometimes, potentially dirty things are downplayed, as to not seem so bad. Now I’m not entirely sure about this, but Lil Wayne’s song “Lollipop” is changed too, where instead of him saying “She lick me like a lollipop”, it’s downplayed to sound more like “Lick like a lollipop”, downplaying what he’s really saying. It’s so unfortunate that every single song out there is just overtly sexual. There are so many other things you can sing about, and it’s sad that everyone only talks about that. Radio stations should definitely reconsider their opinion/ policy on content, regardless of language.

I wanna be sedated

The other day, I had a “reunion” with my old classmates from my lower division science classes. Needless to say, I enjoyed myself and it felt good to be around them again. Flash forward essentially two years, and a lot has changed. One said that basically we’re jaded and fatter. So true. But to the more pressing issue. Lots of them have changed majors, to something less hardcore. The others have stuck with it like I have, and really, we’ve all had our issues. One got all C’s one semester. Another is considering taking a class a third time. The other probably is feeling really jaded too. In any case, I feel SO jaded and unsure of myself.

This year was truly the worst. The friends that I had all pretty much decided to move on from the classes we had and it’s become much harder to see them regularly. Frankly, it is harder to make friends at this point in the game. But seriously, I’m finding it increasingly difficult to focus, find interest in what I’m doing. It’s just so ridiculous. I find myself uninterested and willing to coast through classes. For the first time in college, I’m retaking classes, getting D’s. It’s putting me behind and I’m getting more pressure from my parents, family and peers to graduate on time. Sure, I could, if I kamikaze it through the last year, but even then, there’s no guarantee of anything.

I really liked reading back to last summer, and just feeling so free, so happy. My friends were in this country, not abroad in the Philippines, partying it up. I felt a strong sense of hope and renewal in what was to come. Ochem 1 was bad, but I had part 2 to make up for it. The Olympics were on, I spent a lot of time watching that. I was working longer hours, I was maybe ready for something new for my upper division classes. I was excited to be actually starting my microbiology classes. I knew that I had a chance to makeup for what I was doing. It would all be okay, my GPA would come up, and I would be a happy person again.

Unfortunately, that never happened. I got a D in physics, and I’m so worried about my other class. I hope seriously that he passes me. I hope with my entire soul that he does. As a result my GPA fell like a rock. I retook ochem and realized that I still couldn’t get an A out of it. I’m thinking that I need to get out, just refresh my mind and renew my spirit. I feel broken inside, isolated. It’s strange, my friends know me for being bubbly, a bit of a klutz, essentially this upbeat person. Yet, I don’t feel that way at all. I’ve had deeper and darker thoughts about myself, the future, what it holds for me and for other people. I just feel that my whole life I’ve been making the “right decisions” and been vanilla and playing it safe. I just don’t know anymore.

I got this awesome opportunity to work in a research laboratory this summer, fall, etc. but I’m scared that I might not get it because my grades are so bad. Never in my life have I ever though about this. I’ve never thought that I’d worry about passing classes, getting oodles of C’s and just trying not to get on academic probation. I seriously hope that I can weather the storm, make myself feel ok, get out and feel renewed and happy again. I know that girl is in there somewhere. I need to get out, I need to just find myself again, instead of just going through the motions. I wonder all along, is this the path that I should be on? Have I essentially wasted my whole college career? I need to be positive, be myself, and push myself to be the person I know I can be, instead of the shell of my former self. I can do this, I know I can.

08.08.08

On Friday, the Summer Olympics well begin in Beijing, China. I have to admit, I nerd about this sort of thing all the time it's the Olympics. Not to mention it's the Summer Olympics, which I happen to slightly prefer over the Winter Olympics. In any case, it's been particularly exciting over the last few months, watching and hearing about the Olympic Trials and scoping out the people who will end up representing the country in August. I've particuarly been interested to know if Michael Phelps can top his performance in Athens, if the Men's Basketball team can somehow redeem themselves and reclaim former Team USA glory, if Shawn Johnson really is as good as they say she is and win the Women's Gymnastics All-Around, if Misty May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh dominate like they did last time, etc. There's a lot that I'm looking forward to.

However, I do feel sad that a lot of the coverage isn't simply about the athletes, their preparation and representing their home country. There's been a lot of political stuff going around, and I'm a bit concerned. I know some people are really not happy about the Games being in China at all, considering their records on pollution (potentially harmful air for the locals and the visiting athletes), human rights (Tibet and dealings with Sudan) and worker safety (sweatshops). I get even more upset when I hear about protesters in the city, and denying the visa of human rights advocate and Olympic medalist Joey Cheek and the censoring of Internet sites. However, I still feel that the host country has, by their own inhospitable and paranoid actions, brought this attention to themselves and are making a political statement. I can only hope for the best and that we give the Olympics back to the athletes.

[Picture taken from The Guardian, Sarah Morris's canvas 2028 [Rings], from 2008]

The Wedding

The wedding was beautiful. Not without any problems, though.

BARONGS.Uncle Allan came back from the Philippines to bring the barongs for the wedding. Before he left for the Philippines, about a month before the wedding, all the men in the entourage were measured, to ensure that the barongs would fit properly, and to my knowledge, so they could be custom made and all the groomsmen would have the same barong. WRONG. The barongs were distributed after the wedding rehearsal/dinner and needless to say, they did not fit, or the fit was simply wrong. Even the slim people, like Uncle Jun, had a hard time wearing his. My dad's was rather tight on the arms. Bryce apparently could not even get his over his head. If you know anything about barongs, the thing is, the most important part in the measurement is the shoulder and arms, since the garment can be worn rather long and loose. Suspcicously,the barongs had tags on them, like S, M, whatever, meaning they were store bought, and they came to the conclusion that they were kids sizes. Nobody said anything to Aunty, out of politeness, but I heard that Uncle was REALLY pissed about it, since they paid for the barongs and they were well... not in wearable condition. On the Fourth of July, the adults came to Aunty's house for her birthday, and they came to discuss the barong situation. They came to the conclusion that the men were welcome to wear the barong provided, or just wear their own barongs. Thankfully, Aunty Rel's family owns like a bunch of them, especially from her own 25th Wedding Anniversary. Bryce got one from one of her nephews' barong, and she lent out Kenneth and Ryan's barongs. It all turned out OK in the end.

GETTING READY This is from my own personal escapades on the wedding day, and needless to say, it wasn't so easy. The day before the wedding, I decided to do my nails, so I wouldn't have to worry about them having to dry on the day of the wedding, rendering me useless to help or do anything. My mom gave me a sparkly, silver nail polish, and it was a bit goopy, I suppose from the glitter, and frankly, was a bit strong and tacky on my hands. So I tried removing it, and to my horror, there is no nail polish remover in the house! It's almost midnight and it's the Fourth of July. Nothing is open. So I set my alarm to wake up early to get the remover. So I wake up the next morning, and Jeff wants to drive, so he buys the remover, and I remove the yucky silver stuff, and try to put on a more subtle light pink color. I knew I had to fix my hair before I did my nails, so I did my hair first, and makeup, then nails. Waiting for them to dry was a pain, and I was irritated from not being able to do anything, so I partially ruined my nails, but I was over it already. I also think one of the heels on my shoe was sorta messed up, since I was making a clanking sound when I walked, like the padding on the bottom wore out. Le sigh. It was also a very hot day, so Jeff was complaining about the weather, and didn't want to wear a jacket with his shirt and tie.


WEDDING CEREMONYThe wedding was at 3 p.m. at St. Philomena, and of course, being Filipino, some people came late. My family was one of the first to arrive, so Jeff took the liberty in taking pictures of flowers, of my mom, of me, and he continued taking pictures of the bridesmaids and the groomsmen as they arrived. Surprisingly, the wedding party showed up a bit later than I thought, but they were fine on time. Aunty was SO beautiful. I was able to talk to her before the wedding. So Jeff and I argued about where to sit, as my dad wanted him to take a lot of pictures. Eventually, we got a spot, but the official photographer got in the way A LOT and we didn't get many, if at all, good pictures during the ceremony. OMG Father Dem was the one officiating the wedding, and it was like a whole Mass with readings and all... soooo long. Long, repetitive, and rather uninteresting. I also think he was hitting on Aunty Winnie- he kept talking about how she was glowing and talking about her eyes are those of a woman in love. I take it he did not listen to Aunty's request to keep it short.Jeff and I were SO boredddd. We kept looking around, and laughing since one of the Flower girls was picking her nose and looking down her dress because she was playing with the flowers and one of the petals fell down her dress. Some of the dads were totallly falling asleep and it was so obvious since we were facing them. Darren and John looked bored out of their minds. Aside from that, very nice.


The singer. WTF. I know I should be used to this by now, but it was a man that sounded like a woman. No joke. He sang the opening "You Raise Me Up" by Josh Groban, and man can he hit those high notes without a problem. Later on, Aunty and Uncle had to present flowers to the Virgin Mary and he sang "Ave Maria". Holy Crap. I thought it was a recording. He kept singing after they presented the flowers, and got to the really high part of the song. WOW. Especially for a man. I just looked at Ronna, and were like like "whoa". Apparently, that's his song during Christmas caroling season, and he's one of Uncle Allan's friends. Ronna, Waldo, Ryan, Kenneth, and Trisha came a little bit after the ceremony started, and they sat with me and Jeff.

POST CEREMONY & PRE-RECEPTION Afterwards, we saw that Angel and her boyfriend were there, we said hello, waited for the adults to stop taking pictures,the like. Jeff and I thought that it'd be fun to ride with people our own age to the reception, so Jeff rode with Darren and I rode with Waldo, Ronna and Ryan, as Kenneth still had to go pick something up. We were pretty hungry, and looked on, as my parents got food. We were going to get boba/fast food, but decided not to (I don't remember why... I was pretty hungry). We ended up waiting for the hors d'vours (whatever way you spell it) and I ate quite a bit of cheese and crackers. I still felt bad about not getting boba, especially since Jeff got In-N-Out with Darren, and my parents went to Carl's Jr. Plus, it was open bar at that point, and well, you get the picture. Turns out the that Long Beach Marriott right by the airport is pretty nice, especially the grand ballroom. Definite upgrade from the Holiday Inn that we always go to. The hallways have a lot of statues/figures and it gave the place an interesting feel.


THE RECEPTION All the Usual Suspects, ok, not really, were all at the same table. All the moms, were at one table, the dads at another, and the kids table, consisting of: Me, Ronna, Waldo, Angel, the boyfriend, Ryan, Kenneth, Trisha, Jeff, and supposed to be Camill, but she showed up late, and PJ was talking with me and Kenneth so he sat at her seat. Darren and John sat at the Presidential table with their parents. Nearby was a table of Uncle Allan's friends and when we were talking about things, PJ was giving me a nasty look when I said the word "gay"- "shut up! so loud- they'll hear you!" Needless to say, the dinner conversations were quite good. I was in a slightly nasty mood from being hungry, but I was appeased by the food. The salad was interesting, it was just like lettuce leaves and croutons, and you put on the dressing. Very odd, as the leaves were quite large, and there only like 3 leaves a plate. weird stuff. The bread was good. The steak.... not so good. It was really tough, and mine had a lot of fat. I ate waaay more of it than I should have, as I was very hungry. I paid for it in the end- the dessert was ice cream with some fudge or something. Quite good, although I only ate like 2 bites.


THE PROGRAM You know.. the DJ is always really cheesy and wants you to yell, or wave your napkin around, or whatever. So of course that happened. Uncle's niece sang a Tagalog song, I wasn't quite sure what it was, but I have heard it before. I think it gets played a lot in soap operas or something. They then showed a video of Aunty and Uncle's 25 years together, and they even had a video from the original wedding or something. It was really interesting to see. So cuuute. Surprisingly, they already edited the wedding from a few hours ago, and footage of Aunty before the wedding, putting her veil on, walking down the stairs in their house, and Uncle was waiting for her at the bottom, it was so cuute. Of course, no moment is worth unless Darren does something silly. there's a shot of two people holding hands and you can clearly see their wedding bands. Then they cut to it being Darren and Uncle holding hands and Darren puckering up for a kiss. Very funny. There was no bouqet throwing or anything like that. Just the cake cautting and the money dance. I didn't really know if I was gonna participate, since I didn't have any cash, and I wasn't going to give him my credit card. My mom gave me money, and I danced with Uncle. I realized that Bea was there at the wedding too- the line for the money dance was nearby our table. Ryan kept staring at her chest area. Oh, as an off-side, the waiter went around our table to pour champagne. Then he looked at me and then said "Oh, I'll come back for the Apple Cider for you". The table laughed. I was a little pissed. I mean, Angel, Jeff, her boyfriend, all get champagne and I didn't?! PJ thought it was too funny, and poured some of his beer for me. Cheers, indeed. Afterwards, the couple went up to say their thank yous, and there was a toast, by the best men. Aunty and Uncle thanked everyone for coming, for celebrating with them, for being special to them. But it was interesting that Uncle took that moment to really talk to his kids about raising them, and not always being there as a father, and saying how Aunty took over as the primary person caring for them, and how he was always trying to provide for his family. Very interesting. John spoke first, with a bit of humor, quoting from the movie "Chuck and Larry" about how marriage is like a circle, how it doesn't have sides, or something. Darren then said he couldn't possibly follow John's funny speech, but he gave a more heartfelt speech, spoken from the heart, he said. He talked about how his parents were an example of how love should be, and how he hoped that someday he would find someone to love him like that (It sounded a little desperate, but it was a good speech).

WAITNG AROUNDAfter the dance, it was time to do the actual dancing, and yeahhh. I bolted out of there, not exactly for the best reasons, as Ronna wanted to smoke with Camill, and I needed to get out of there. I was not going to be videotaped dancing. And I was not going to be dancing in the same room as my parents. Hell no. Camill was drinking it up though, even then. People were buying her drinks all the time. Like wow. It was getting pretty cold outside, so we went inside, and there was a lounge. We hung out there. Waldo left pretty quickly, since his friend was leaving to go somewhere, and so he left. By this time, I was with Ronna, Camill, Ryan, Angel and the boyfriend. We all kinda just sat around, Camill kept making funny remarks about the couple. Whatever she was drinking, though, tasted really good. I felt sorta bad for Ryan, since she kept asking to dance, go out for a smoke, get her a drink, whatever. Anyway, so Darren and John came out to talk with us, and Kuya Armie came pretty soon too. John and Kuya Armie scared me because I was sitting in this little sorta crack in the wall, and there was a nearby statue, facing straight ahead. They told me that they saw the same statue with its head turned at an angle. I was so scared. They said there might be a security camera inside. Ronna and I inspected it, and it didn't seem right. We looked at it for a while, and then Kuya Armie came back and said that there was a similar statue down the hall with its head turned. I was SOOO relieved. Bryce was with us for a while, and we got him to dance for us, although I wouldn't call it dancing, per se. We all started talking about break dancing, and asked Bryce if he knew how to do it. We told him to do the worm, and his version of the worm looked like he was humping the floor or something. Very sexual and just... bad. We got him to do the crab walk too, and it ended up more like the Exorcist when she came down the stairs. Needless to say, we told him not to do that anymore.


THE AFTER-PARTY So Camill wanted to hang out some moreafter the wedding, and honestly, I was pretty tired at this point, and I wanted to sleep. Everyone else though, was going to Darren's house, I'm not sure if she got permission first. Ronna was gonna drive to her house then go to Darren's. I told her I would go with her, so she wouldn't drive alone. But my mom kept asking a lot of questions, and I was getting pretty irritated, partially because I was tired and didn't wanna deal with it, and I think I gave the vibe that I didn't want to go, cos Ronna and Jeff kept saying "If you don't wanna go, just say so." Anyway, I was finally allowed to go, and so I went with Ronna. Jeff rode with Angel and the boyfriend, and Ryan rode with Camill. We all thought that Uncle and Aunty were staying at the hotel, but they went home. It honestly was a bit embarassing. Ronna brought the Hookah, so that's what was going on. Just that and a bit of smoking and talking. You could so tell that Darren was tired. Him and Kuya Armie sat with us and were pretty tired. I learned that Kuya Armie isn't really into drinking or dancing, and that Darren wanted to go back with him to the Philippines to get away.(Sidenote: He planned on doing that, but it ended up not going through, as the flight was fully booked) Angel's boyfriend apparently bought a green laser pointer for $60 and showed it off to us. Apparently the laser goes all the way up to 1 mile. I can believe it. You can literally point out a star to someone. Camill wanted to drink some more, but Darren was pretty adamant about not drinking anymore- if they were going to drink, he said I had to join in. Camill then took that to mean no one was drinking anymore that night. After they finished the Hookah, we all went home, or rather, Angel's boyfriend drove me and Jeff home. But we went to Famima!! really quick, with Ronna, as I was a bit hungry. And that's the end of it. I knocked out when I got home.

I will attempt to post pictures, when I get a hold of the files on my dad's computer.


<3